Becoming a mother is often described as one of life's most rewarding experiences - but it's also one of the most challenging, in ways that people don't always talk about. While there's plenty of advice on how to care for your newborn, there's often less conversation about how to care for you.

The truth is, many new mothers face mental health challenges in the months and years after giving birth. If you're feeling overwhelmed, anxious, sad, or unlike yourself, you're not alone - and you're not doing anything wrong.

1. Postnatal Anxiety

While most people have heard of postnatal depression, postnatal anxiety is just as common - and sometimes overlooked. New mothers experiencing postnatal anxiety often describe:

• Racing thoughts that feel impossible to switch off

• Intense worry about their baby's health, safety, or development

• Feeling tense, restless, or 'on edge'

• Trouble sleeping, even when the baby is asleep

• Physical symptoms like a racing heart, dizziness, or nausea

Postnatal anxiety can feel all-consuming, and mothers often keep it to themselves out of fear they'll be seen as overreacting. But this type of anxiety is very real, and help is available.

What Can Help:

• Talking openly with a trusted health professional

• Mindfulness and grounding techniques

• Learning to differentiate helpful vs. unhelpful worry

• Therapy focused on managing anxiety and building coping strategies

2. Postnatal Depression

Postnatal Depression (PND) goes beyond the 'baby blues', which are typically short-lived and resolve within the first couple of weeks after birth. Postnatal depression lingers and can deeply affect your emotional well-being.

Common signs include:

• Persistent sadness or low mood

• Feeling numb or disconnected from your baby or your life

• Loss of interest in things you usually enjoy

• Changes in appetite, sleep, or energy

• Feelings of guilt, hopelessness, or worthlessness

PND can make mothers feel isolated, ashamed, or as though they're 'failing' - but the reality is, this is a medical condition, not a personal flaw.

What Can Help:

• Counselling or psychological therapy

• Medical support through your GP or maternal health provider

• Building a supportive village around you - friends, family, support groups

3. Adjustment Difficulties

The transition to motherhood can feel like a full-body identity shift. Even when a baby is deeply wanted, the adjustment can be emotionally complex.

You may feel:

• Overwhelmed by the constant needs of your baby

• A sense of loss for your 'old life' or past self

• Uncertainty about who you are now outside of motherhood

• Frustration at how much mental space is taken up by things you didn't anticipate

This challenge is often underestimated. It's not just about practical changes - it's about learning how to exist in this new version of your life.

What Can Help:

• Giving yourself permission to grieve and adapt at your own pace

• Talking with other mothers who can normalise the experience

• Working with a therapist to explore identity, roles, and self-worth in motherhood.

4. Mum Guilt

Mum guilt is relentless for so many mothers. It whispers:

"You're not doing enough."

"You're doing it wrong."

"You should be grateful, not struggling."

Mum guilt can show up around:

• How you feed your baby (bottle, breast, mix)

• Whether you go back to work

• Taking time for yourself

• Feeling frustrated, exhausted, or needing help

The thing is, mum guilt thrives on impossible standards. It convinces mothers that perfection is the only acceptable outcome - when in reality, what your child needs most is a good-enough, loving, human mum.

What Can Help:

• Challenging the unrealistic expectations you hold for yourself

• Learning self-compassion and the skill of 'talking to yourself like you would a friend'

• Finding supportive spaces where mum guilt is understood, not dismissed

5. Relationship Strain

Having a baby can deeply impact relationships. Even the strongest partnerships can feel stretched by:

• Sleep deprivation

• New responsibilities and changing dynamics

• Less time for emotional connect or intimacy

• Different parenting styles or expectations

Many mothers feel like they've lost their teammate in the chaos of early parenting. It's easy to fall into patterns of resentment, miscommunication, or emotional distance.

What Can Help:

• Honest, regular check-ins with your partner

• Couples counselling to rebuild connection and understanding

• Finding small ways to reconnect, even when time is limited

Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone

Motherhood is a complex, life-changing journey. If you're struggling, it doesn't mean you're doing a bad job - it means you're human, and you deserve support.

Your mental health matters just as much as your baby's wellbeing. Your needs are important.

And you don't have to carry it all alone.

If you're ready to find support, whether though one-on-one counselling or workshops, I'd love to talk alongside you.

You are doing better than you think, mumma.